The Free Land of German Coasts is a massive, safe nation, notable for its ubiquitous missile silos, irreverence towards religion, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate population of 3.365 billion German Coastsians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Law & Order. The average income tax rate is 78.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong German Coastsian economy, worth 217 trillion florins a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Trout Farming industry, with significant contributions from Arms Manufacturing and Tourism. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 64,508 florins, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

All the playground's a stage for German Coastsian schoolchildren, the GCBI Channel Tunnel project is plagued by delays, listless juries are assembled for the simplest of court cases, and popular cartoon characters frequently appear in government-sponsored PSAs reminding students to say no to drugs. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. German Coasts's national animal is the wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

German Coasts is ranked 42,140^th in the world and 2,396^th in Lazarus for Most Cultured, scoring 74 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.